I used to believe I only wanted a big butt, a flat stomach, and to be better than those around me. Which is true, for the most part. What I’ve found is that, what I truly want is to be better than my old self, to inspire my followers and the people I speak to on the streets. Most importantly, I want to build other women up to show them that they are absolutely stunning in everything they are. I don’t want to compete with the women around me when I already compete with myself. With that said let me explain the name of this blog page, Wolfness.
I came up with it six months ago, after playing around with the idea of building my own personal brand. I had struggled to think of a name for what I had been dreaming to do and once Wolfness came into my mind nothing else spoke to my soul the way it does. The name itself stands for “she-wolf”. Which really is the biggest component to Wolfness but theres more.
There had been an incident that changed my whole way of thinking as I knew it, and put meaning into my dreams. For years I watched women deliberately shame other women, and I was never strong enough to stand up to these bullies. Yes, “bully” is the term I use, which sounds a lot like the typical school bully. But that’s exactly what I’m talking about people! Bullies exist throughout every stage of life.
This life altering incident started on one of the most used social media platforms, Twitter. There was a mean girl, who made a disturbing comment about what women should and shouldn’t post. Her comment was posted deliberately after my best friend had uploaded a cute bikini pic with her puppers by the pool! Sounds cute, right? That was until she had seen the comment posted making it seem as if her uploaded picture was “to slutty”.
All of us ladies have a radar. You know the one that sends a chill down your spine indicating that something shady is pointing at you? Well this was that feeling for my friend. She confronted the mean girl, asking if there was a problem. To which her response was snarky and defensive, claiming the tweet hadn’t been about my friend.
The story continues on instagram (we all know what this is)… Long story short, the mean girl got information from a private account and blew it into a petty whirl. It ended with my best friends instagram pages going up on the bullies personal account with mean and nasty words in her caption. All in spite of her own insecurities. Let me tell you, this didn’t sit well with me as a best friend. I mean come on, I was already been fed up with all the hate I’d witnessed between women.
I had commented about the stupidity of the drama she had caused and how judgement only hurts oneself. Whether the tweet had been about my best friend or not, it pointed out her own unfriendliness and insecurities. It wasn’t necessary due the the simple fact that what another woman puts on her social media is none of your business. If you don’t like something, scroll past it and/or unfollow that person. You have that freedom! If you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say it at all. A saying we have learned from the very beginning. With todays society, I have never found something to be more true. Well, maybe a few more things but in this instance I couldn’t have found a more genuine phrase. Life’s to short to be anything but kind.
You see, us women need to stick together. The slut shaming, using derogatory terms such as ugly, fat, unworthy, and disgusting, along with all the other shit (sorry not sorry) we women put on each other, is so damaging to the victims mental well-being. Seeing first hand how the cruelty between women destroys confidence and causes doubt, is where the idea of Wolfness came about. (turning into Dr. Sues y’all)
When I think of a wolf, I think loyal, strong, beautiful, intelligent, caring, personal power, and instinct. This is how us women should be with one another. We should have a pack mentality, like wolves. Be there for each other and protect each other. We should shower love onto one another in a world that is already so cruel. Having the backs of the women around you and putting positivity into their lives with the extraordinary tools we have in todays society, helps unite women as a whole. Look at the other women all around the world and think of them as your pack.
I’ll close this with my favorite quote by Nikita Gill, “If all girls were taught to love each other fiercely instead of how to compete with each other and hate their own bodies, what a different and beautiful world we would live in.” I challenge all of you ladies out there reading this to be a wolf!